Long and busy day at work... The NAACP Image Awards have been driving all of us crazy.

Went to the gym before work and getting ready to go out and celebrate something of which I have not yet been told about, should I be frightened?

Tired, but ready to keep it going... Hope I don't get to wet when it starts raining later.

I am SO glad that I am finished with graveyard shifts, at least for this week. The person I'm working for is still out with the flu so anything is possible for next week...

Came home and crashed for a few hours then ended up at Fab Hot Dogs in Reseda for some lunch with a friend. I had the "LA Street Dog" with chili cheese fries and a Coke, AWESOME!

Afterward we went over to Westfield Topanga, formerly Topanga Plaza, and boy have they added to and fixed that place up. I had an great time looking around and in the process, I bought the following (sort of):

• Audi A5 Cabriolet in Sprint Blue
• About $1000 in clothes at Neiman Marcus
  love the Royal Underground Spring Collection
• over at Cartier
  a $9750 watch
  a $2800 ring
• finally $40 in underwear and socks at Target which I left the store with.

Normally I get ignored when I go to such places but today I must have been oozing money because the staff in all the stores I went to couldn't have been more helpful or nicer -- I'll take it as a good omen on my recent decisions. Shopping for your "dreams" can be an amazing way of programming the universe when using the Law of Attraction (LoA).

Had dinner in West Los Angeles at Pho 99. Everyone seems to think this place is amazing and it was good but I thought the rice noodles in my Pho Ga were a bit rubbery, personally I prefer Pho Show in Culver City or Absolutely PHO Bulous on La Cienega by the Beverly Center.

Well tomorrow is going to be an early and LONG day, so I'm going to bed -- nighty night.

Well it was a nice day till I decided to accept a call from work and guess who's doing graveyard tonight... Oh yeah!

Got paid yesterday and I paid today. LOL Even living cheaply takes money in Los Angeles.

Tried to sleep this afternoon so I could do this shift but only had limited success. I'm going to try to go to the gym after work before crashing. The big question: will I be returning to regular sleep hours or working graveyard again tonight for the same coworker who called in sick? HMMMM

Overall it was an excellent day today.

I had a breakfast to go to this morning and it was a lot of fun. I rode my bike the 6.5 miles there and arrived about 15 minutes early and thought I would try to cool down before going in. I took off my jacket and the heat came off like steam in the brisk morning air, it looked so cool (OK, so I'm a bit strange, you didn't know this?).

I was a bit later than I had planned leaving and I thought I might try catching the Culver City bus to cut on my riding and make up some time. Just as I was riding up to the station, I saw one of their buses turning the corner, I thought I had literally just missed it. Turns out it was just pulling into the station and about 2 minutes later another pulled out to start its run, perfect timing.

Work went well, a bit slow but well. I got home and fell asleep for a bit and was awakened when the kitties decided it was time for their dinner, I am their eternal slave...

Yesterday was both amazing and strange.

I woke up with a mild headache that I attributed to releasing of stress. I am one of those people that tends to hold onto their stress while they are going through things. When it is finally over I pay for it with tension headaches for a day or two but then it seems to be gone... Thank God!

I popped an Advil to help me get through the morning and even managed to meditate pretty well. I really enjoyed it.

At work I finally had my meeting regarding April 15^th and it is now official. I am sometimes completely amazed at how much of a drama queen I can be in my own head. I expected a few difficulties getting through the meeting but it went both really well and I was wished well by all parties involved.

The strange thing was last night when I just could not get tired. I stayed up until about 3:00AM and for the life of me couldn't imagine why. I have been getting plenty of sleep, but not enough that I should be THAT un-tired.

I found out today that a friend had been in some trouble and had been planning on coming over to my house for some help and that they had decided to get another form of help since they thought they were too late for me (that has been since remedied). Fortunately, all is well overall with them and other than a few bumps and bruises on their ego and spirit. What a coincidence.

I didn't make it to the gym today or will I tomorrow, I slept in a bit and the gym closes an hour after I get off work tonight. I would go before work tomorrow, but I already have a scheduled breakfast that I will be racing to work from in the morning. So, I guess Monday will be my next visit, I'll probably go after work so I do not have to get up so early and take my time.

Interesting day, my meeting to announce April 15^th has been delayed a day but there were some leaks via the coffee house route. Oh well...

I'm feeling fine but it has been kind of difficult to keep my positive mindset going, work is work and it is what it is. I'm doing OK but a minor headache has been thrumming in my neck and skull for the last couple of hours. With how I'm feeling, I'm REALLY glad that I did my meditation this morning, it always gives me a charge and I do not even want to think about how draggy I would be if I hadn't.

I have class tonight, looking forward to getting there. No class next week, just a personal reminder.

What an excellent day!

Not that I had that much planned for the day, but I managed to get everything done. I went to breakfast with a friend then checked out a new bank since my old one has decided that using the bank is not good enough, I must pay for the privilege (gotta love the corporate greed -- over $8.50/month).

It was a beautiful day, first one on my day off in quite a while that was sunny and warm enough to lay out for some Sol worship. Then I went to the gym and had an excellent workout, it felt SO good.

Had dinner at this Japanese Teriyaki place called Sarku Japan in the newly redone Fox Hills Mall, oops Westfield Culver City.

Overall things have been great today, yesterday REALLY charged my batteries and I have set a few more things in motion for after the 15^th of April. I really am happier than I have been in SO long. I have light at the end of the tunnel and "the world is my oyster" or so they say.

The Beginnings of Recovery

11:00

OK, so something is up... The Universe is conspiring something and I find I am looking forward to seeing what.

I woke up and decided to wear my Buddha shirt to my breakfast with K and R. Afterward I had planned to go over to the Grind or Library and do some writing. During breakfast I asked R what he was doing today and what route he was planning to take. On a spur of the moment decision I decided to go to Lake Shrine. I LOVE it here!

SoCal in February and I could actually get away with shorts and a T-shirt but I am dressed a bit more appropriately. Am I slipping into respectability?!?

Something has been weighing on my heart for a while and I have been in such a funk and verging on depression. I think I will spend the day relaxing and meditating to see what it is I am missing.

I have chosen a great spot to start with, I'm on the landing between the windmill and the waterfall (I never noticed it before). One of the swans just scared the daylights out of me... I suddenly had him(?) swim by and start flapping his wings like crazy, really changed the mood suddenly, but he seems to have settled down for now.

Just being here makes me feel better, I am not exactly peaceful within but I can feel the peace without and may be able to take some of it home. I miss peace at hime. Maybe I can find what it is that I am missing there, it has gone from sanctuary to something else but I can still feel its potential to be otherwise.

There is a turtle that keeps swimming by, almost as if he's keeping an eye out for me and making sure I am OK.

Just taking the day here will at least charge my batteries a bit, they are nearly empty. I have been so disconnected and just drifting on the currents of my life. I feel like I have been trying to steer currents to a destination of my choosing but I forgot or lost my rudder... I will remedy that!

---

17:50 aka 5:50 PM

I took a short break from Lake Shrine at noon to make a Communicator call for my Landmark Series, it was the shortest call I have done so far, but it seemed pretty good. I went back in and walked around the lake and stopped in the chapel to meditate for a while.

While I was meditating, a gentleman who had been meditating in the front of the room got up to leave and I could not help but giggle a bit. He was wearing a leather motorcycle outfit and trying SO hard to be quiet and not disturb others, but the harder he tried the noisier he was.

I took some nice photos of the area and will put them on Facebook when I get home.

I finally left about 2:00 and while grabbing some lunch, had an amazing conversation with my Dad that lasted almost 90 minutes. It was unlike anything we have had in the past, no judgments on either side, just two people having a conversation about whatever came up. Those who read my blog entries are likely aware of the difficulties I have had in the past with my dad, not today.

I stopped of at 212 Pier, probably one of the COOLEST coffee houses I have ever been to, to type up and finish this entry, I am beginning to think I may have picked up a bit of a sunburn today, I have that radient heat feeling you get with an minor burn. Oh well, if that is the cost of such an amazing day, COOL!!!!

I am feeling better than I have in months, I may just be about ready for my meeting at work on Thursday and the repercussions in 60 days. Viva le Spiritgeek!

Note:
This entry was cross-posted to both the Spiritgeek Blog and the Personal Journal.

Well life looks like it may be returning to some sense of normality for a bit. My ill co-worker returns tomorrow and I'm hoping for Friday off. HR and Payroll and I are going to be butting heads over the usual policies and the actual payment of the 6^th and 7^th days and the overtime it is supposed to be. Oh fun fun...

I finally came up with a direction for the Zeitgeist newsletter for February that I not only like but think is much better than the usual Valentines drivel.

Had a good workout at the gym after work. Did the full weight set, but just did not have the energy to do cardio, only did about 10 minutes.

I was thinking about this guy I met last week, I may be about to make a fool of myself, but I think I want to see him again. Not only was he cute as a button but he seemed really sweet. Awe...

Wow, I was exhausted last night.

I got home from work and was supposed to do a tele-conference at 19:30 and after getting ready, had about 15 minutes to kill. Turned on the TV to watch a little B5 and I don't think I made it through the opening credits before I passed out and didn't wake till almost 01:00.

One of my co-workers is out sick with bronchitis(?) so I came in this morning for the day shift. I thought I would take a quick moment to get the journal up to date since I slept through last nights entry.

Yesterday was a OK, but fast workout at the gym. That book I'm reading, "Body for Life", has made me wonder if I might be overdoing some of my workouts. I have been going every other day and doing my weight training each time. I finally got to the section where it goes into the workout details and I noticed that he is suggesting a 4 day rotation on the weights. His layout is weights on say Mon, Wed and Fri with Cardio on Tue, Thr and Sat. So on week one, Mon and Fri would be Upper Body with Wed being Lower Body and Abs and the inverse on the following week.

Looks like I'm working tomorrow as well.